


A Merry Turian Christmas

by Renfields_Spider



Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Party, Secret Santa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-31
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-10-01 14:51:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17246183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Renfields_Spider/pseuds/Renfields_Spider
Summary: Christmas time is an enigma to Garrus, or rather why does Shepard hate it so much?





	A Merry Turian Christmas

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MizDirected](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MizDirected/gifts).



'Do you have a moment Shepard? I have some questions about Christmas.’ Garrus held up his data pad and swiped down as though he had a long list although there was nothing there.

‘Nope.’ Shepard did not lift her head up from the pieces of rifle she had laid out in front of her but continued to clean the bit she held in her hands. From this angle Garrus could not only feel her tension but see it too. She always held it in her shoulders she often rolled them to loosen them up; he guessed that’s where she carried her responsibilities.

‘Nope?’ He made sure she could hear his confusion as she couldn’t see his face.

‘No, we are not over analysing Christmas so that you can poke holes in my ridiculous human culture.’

‘Really?’

‘Yup.’

‘Well… that’s disappointing. I had some excellent questions lined up.’

‘I bet you did.’

‘Not one little question?’

‘No, not one. I know you, you’ll weasel in more.’

‘Weasel?’

‘It’s… you know what never mind. I’m sure you have some outdated, nonsense customs of your own to mull over.’

‘I do, but my father is not here to bluster about my disrespect to tradition… you are.’

‘This is all irrelevant, Christmas is two weeks away. We might be dead in that time.’

‘It’s optimistic of me I know, I just wanted to understand it better.’

‘Watch a vid.’

‘I did and it left me with more questions than when I’d started.’

‘Of course it did.’

‘Your people do not have adequate security in place if you allow strangers in the night to enter and steal your food.’

Shepard stared into space for a moment clearly thinking and then a half smile formed on her lips, a curve that warmed him. 

‘Don’t you have something to calibrate?’ Her words were dismissive, maybe harsh but Garrus saw she had relaxed a little. Mission accomplished.

Her grumpiness amused Garrus in more ways than he could say. With them it was more about what wasn’t said. So, what was she leaving out? Shepard wasn’t a great sharer of personal things, if somebody had asked him what her favourite armour was or her preferred weapon of choice he could answer in detail, but her much-loved colour, food or drink? He had guesses at best. She didn’t want to talk about Christmas whereas everyone else on the human crew was looking forward to it. At first it had seemed silly to focus on it, what with everything else going on, but he was starting to see that humans liked to have something to look forward too. It wasn’t just limited to humans either and they seemed extremely keen to welcome other races into it. Or into the spirit of it, as they had told him.

The most confusing aspect of it all was Shepard’s reaction to it. Garrus had watched her speak with the crew and she seemed generally enthused about Christmas, yet when he’d mentioned it, she’d shut him down. Now he turned it in to a joke between them, he liked to see her smile it lit her face and his day. But it had evolved into something more for him, something a little darker and deeper. Investigator Garrus had surfaced… and he loved a mystery. Why did Shepard show one face to him and then show another to her Christmas loving crew? He didn’t know but he wanted to find out…

‘Garrus, I’m used to the differences in social etiquette between races but I’m pretty sure it’s weird for Turians to stare without speaking after a certain amount of time.’

Garrus snapped out of his thoughts to see Shepard looking at him, half-annoyed, half-laughing at him. Flustered by his lapse in behaviour he brazened it out.

‘Well, I was just wondering if you were going to polish that rifles alignment laser into a nub or did it do something to piss you off?’

Shepard turned back to her cleaning, the amused smile turning into a full smirk.

‘Yeah, it kept asking me about Christmas.’

Garrus chuckled, he couldn’t help it. He walked away from her and he let her have the moment. It was little things like that, just the smallest of engagements that really lifted him. Would he acknowledge what lurked behind respect, admiration and undying loyalty today? No. No, treasure the moments, he told himself, let it be simple and just try to keep everyone alive. But Christmas was a different story and that he would investigate. And if nothing else it would serve as a useful distraction from the collectors.

A couple of days later they docked in the Citadel and Garrus saw that as an opportunity to seek out more information from the crew before he spoke to Shepard again. There were few places on the promenade that were exclusively human run that might be able to help him. He quickly found the bars to be worthless, but it seemed that humans were homesick for Earth food and other trivialities he barely comprehended. There were places off the beaten track if one knew where to look and he did.

The small eatery was next to a tacky human gift shop, which had been decorated with lights. The restaurant had a variety of foods he knew would make him sick, but that did not stop him browsing and watching other humans eat. He wondered what Shepard might like and whether he should surprise her?

‘Garrus, what are you doing down here?’ Vakarian felt a gentle pat on his back and he turned to see Joker.

‘Well, you know me, Jeff…’

‘Well I thought I did? You do know you can’t eat this stuff, right? Mind you, better off not… if you know what I mean?’ Joker nodded at the dubious surroundings and possible lack of hygiene.

‘I think I do.’

‘So what are you looking for?’

‘Joker? Garrus? Not the people I expected to see down here,’ said Kaidan who was surprised but pleased to see them.

‘Lieutenant,’ Garrus nodded in acknowledgement.

‘Well, I don’t know about Garrus, but I’m just looking for some home cooked food. Although, I’m not so sure about this place anymore, full of dodgy characters.’ Joker gave both Garrus and Kaidan as appraising look.

Kaidan smiled and looked around past Garrus and at the tables beyond.

‘Well, luckily for both of you I know this place quite well. I’m meeting Shepard here.’

‘Your meeting Shepard for dinner?’ Garrus blurted out the words before he could stop himself.

‘No… not like that. It’s more of a trying to get her off the ship and out of her mind for a bit. Plus, I love Christmas and this place is known for celebrating it.’

Garrus nodded thoughtfully and wished he’d come up with that idea, it was a good one. 

‘Does Shepard even celebrate Christmas?’ Asked Joker and Garrus was grateful he’d asked because he’d love to know the answer.

‘That’s a good question,’ Kaidan stroked his chin as he thought, ‘She doesn’t talk about it much, certainly no religious reason not to as far as I’m aware.’

Joker picked up a menu and scrolled through the options.

‘Hey, Garrus, they have dextro food too. Themed and flavoured as close to Earth food as possible to help “share the human food experience” with us’. Joker air quoted with heavy sarcasm but seemed quite interested. ‘What do you think?’

Garrus took the menu and scrolled. Dextro alternatives of things that didn’t sound overly appealing and there seemed to be a lot of alcohol-flavoured dishes. Garrus gave the menu to Kaidan.

‘I’m happy to expand my horizons and see how your food tastes fare against mine, but next week we get to do the same in a dextro based place,’ said Garrus.

‘Seems fair,’ replied Kaidan.

‘This looks like the start to a very bad joke,’ said Shepard from behind. ‘A Turian, a biotic and a human walk into a bar…’

‘Well I found these guys hanging about making the place look rough,’ said Joker, ‘But now you are making the place look much classier than it is.’

‘Thanks, Jeff. Are you both eating here too?’

‘Yup, I’m dining on the ‘Christmas Dextro Delights’ menu,’ said Garrus. Shepard raised a questioning eyebrow. ‘Yes, that was pretty much what I thought too.’

‘Come on then, I’m digesting my own stomach here, let’s get a table.’

They sat down at a table and ordered quickly although Garrus dithered over his choices, in the end it was easier to let his friends choose. Shepard seemed to enjoy the meal and it was nice to see her relax. He knew being in charge was a tough responsibility, but she wore it well… most of the time. Even though it wasn’t quite Christmas there were many humans celebrating it early and it gave Garrus the ideal opportunity to watch and observe customs. Joker told stories about inappropriate Christmas gifts and how every year his mother would bake cookies. Kaidan’s Christmas traditions seemed to involve a lot of snow and drinking, not something that mixed well Garrus thought. Both reminisced fondly and Shepard laughed along with them, but never added her own stories. Even he had told of a tradition where family would come together and remember the war dead, which was essentially an excuse to drink and tell dramatic stories.

Slowly the realisation came to him and when it did it hit him hard. Oh… he thought, she doesn’t know how. Shepard literally didn’t know how to celebrate in a close-knit unit because she’d had no family until military and then most of them went home for Christmas with their own families. It made his heart ache uncomfortably and he stared at her. This was why she never answered his questions or invited the conversations.

‘You okay there, Vakarian? You seem to have left the conversation a few minutes ago?’ Asked Shepard.

Garrus took a moment to sip his ‘Dex-Nog’ which was thoroughly vile.

‘I’m wondering if this drink really tastes like it should. I mean how would a Turian truly know, it’s not like we can taste test them. Someone might just have made everything as tasteless as possible for laughs, I’d never know the difference’.

‘That’s a good point, how do they know?’ Shepard conceded.

‘I reckon some brave Turians died in the duty of taste testing mince pies,’ said Joker. ‘Or were really, really sick. Bravely sick.’

‘I think I’m done for the night, as much as I’d love to stay longer, I promised Anderson an update and I should go see him before it gets too late.’ Shepard stood and said her goodbyes. Garrus watched her leave and wondered how he could have missed such a glaring social blunder.

‘What’s on your mind, Garrus?’ asked Kaidan, who sat back in his chair lazily sipping his beer. ‘You’ve been distracted.’

‘Yes, I have. I’ve realised something and I’m not sure how to fix it.’

Kaidan sat forward and frowned a little. 

‘What’s eating you?’

‘This Dex-nog I think,’ When Kaidan started to explain Garrus waved his hand and chuckled, ‘I know what it means. Sorry, couldn’t resist. I am worried about our commander, about Shepard.’

‘How so?’ asked Joker.

‘I forgot she’s an orphan.’

‘She is?’ Kaidan’s eyebrows raised up sharply in that way all humans do when they are caught off guard. Garrus was surprised he didn’t know.

‘You didn’t know?’

‘No, I didn’t… Joker, did you?’ asked Kaidan.

‘No, Sir, I did not. Oh god…’ Jokers hands slowly covered his face and he started to groan.

‘When you say orphan… is that a recent thing or something that happened when she was a kid?’ said Kaidan.

‘Does it matter?’ asked Garrus.

‘Oh yeah, it matters,’ Kaidan nodded gravely.

‘She said she lost them as child and grew up in poverty on Earth.’

‘Oh god that’s so much worse,’ groaned Joker from behind his hands.

‘I’m surprised you both don’t know.’

‘She doesn’t talk to me about herself really,’ said Kaidan, ‘the conversation is much more about guns and armour than herself.’

‘Yeah, I mean, she’s all “Joker, fly here and, Joker, fly there” than “Joker, here are the top ten things you should know about me”, you know what I’m saying?’ said Joker peeping out from behind his hands.

‘Not remotely,’ said Garrus. He was surprised honestly, she spoke to him about herself quite a bit and he did about himself too.

‘She talks to you?’ asked Kaidan.

‘Yes…’ Garrus paused thoughtfully. It occurred to him that if she wasn’t telling the others about herself, maybe she didn’t want them to know. Was he crossing a line here?

‘A lot?’ asked Kaidan again.

‘Yeah. But now I’m wondering if I’ve said too much?’ He twitched his mandibles in irritation at himself.

‘No, I don’t think so, Garrus. I mean it’s not a secret or she would have said so. Christ, I wish she’d said something, I feel like a complete ass for going on about family. That’s the problem when you have one, you just assume everyone else does too,’ Kaidan’s brow furrowed and he looked back over the restaurant in the direction Shepard had left. Maybe he was thinking about catching up with her.

‘Well, that’s bummed my Christmas cheer,’ said Joker. 

As Garrus watched Kaidan and Joker he realised that Shepard had a new family now. He didn’t know how long that would last for, but it felt like family to him. Perhaps she just needed reminding of that.

‘I have an idea,’ said Garrus. ‘But I’m going to need you both to help me.’

‘Whatever you need, ‘said Kaidan, ‘As long as you tell us what it is first.’

‘I said I had an idea… a plan is something that’s still forming and that’s where you both come in.’

‘Okay, but if you make Shepard mad I’m bailing and blaming you,’ Joker nodded and lent in like a conspirator.

Two weeks later…

 

Garrus knew that either Shepard was going to love what they’d done or hate it. He had a constant bubbling anxiety whenever he thought about it. When they were on mission, it was completely out of his head, but then Kaidan would catch his eye and they’d smile knowing what they were up too. They’d pulled Liara into it as well, she knew about Shepard’s past but only because she’d heard Anderson mention it. They’d made a few decorations and found something akin to a tree but was a branch with green paint. They ‘repurposed’ lights from maintenance and persuaded Rupert to cook a few cookies and other treats. Of course, they’d had to get extra supplies and sneak them on without Shepard knowing. The hardest part was getting ‘the outfit’ and Garrus volunteered wearing it as he knew Joker couldn’t and carry things. Kaidan plain refused as he said Garrus would suit it better. Vakarian did not question this until he put it on and stood in front of the others. They laughed.

‘I really don’t see what is so amusing. I know Turians don’t wear beards and this...’ he fluffed the white beard up, ‘is ridiculous’.

‘Garrus, believe me when I say you being Santa was the best idea,’ Joker wiped tears from his eyes. ‘The absolute best.’

He held the sack full of gifts up and scratched at his face with the other hand.

‘I hope it helps Shepard, otherwise I’m going to feel very silly,’ said Garrus.

‘You don’t already?’ asked Liara. She smiled kindly, but he knew she was teasing him too.

‘Yes.’

‘So what now? Are you one with the décor?’ Asked Liara.

‘Yes, we are just waiting for Shepard to come down from her quarters. We asked EDI to keep her busy if she left too early,’ replied Kaidan. ‘I guess it’s now or never.’

The crew gathered and Garrus hid out of sight so that Shepard could not see him as she entered. The beard itched, and he wondered how humans tolerated facial hair of any kind. He heard the doors to the mess open and a cheer was raised by everyone. Garrus peeped out and waited for Kaidan to give him his cue. As Garrus watched he was taken away by the sheer delight on Shepard’s face. Her smile was wide, and her laugh was lilted and light. She pointed at the Christmas branch and laughed while Kaidan told her how long it took to make. Kaidan then caught his eye and waved him over.

‘Ho-ho-ho,’ said Garrus with all the enthusiasm he could muster. The crew clapped and laughed, but the moment Shepard locked eyes with him, time seemed to slow. She looked upset, the smile disappeared from her face and she turned away. Vakarian’s gut turned and he tried to muster through. ‘I hear there are some good boys and girls here, ho-ho-ho.’ Kaidan smiled and gestured for the others to let Garrus through.

Shepard turned back around, and her eyes glistened but this time she was smiling.

‘So what does the Turian Santa have in the way of presents?’ asked Shepard.

‘Well, for the good boys and girls, it’s duty and for the bad ones it’s also duty.’ Shepard laughed which Garrus hoped she would. ‘So, who’s been good then?’ A few hands went up, ‘Who’s been bad?’ A few more went up and everyone laughed.

Someone put on some music and Garrus handed out the gifts, which were carefully made cookies from Rupert. A taste of home he’d called it, but Garrus was painfully aware it still highlighted the lack of well… everything for Shepard. She smiled, she laughed and even dance that silly dance of hers. If she felt any grief she did not show it and she constantly thanked them all for the effort made. Kaidan said it was for morale but winked at Garrus after. 

When the party was over Garrus felt that nothing could dampen his spirits, not even the damn itchy beard. As he settled down for the night, he looked at the red heap on the floor and wondered at human customs. Do ours seem as strange, he wondered? Probably. He would sleep well tonight knowing that they’d done something to lighten things a little.

‘Knock, knock,’ said Shepard standing in the doorway looking at him. ‘Can I come in for a moment?’

‘Sure,’ said Garrus. ‘Everything okay?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Was there something you needed?’ Garrus prompted.

‘You started all that didn’t you?

‘All of what?’

‘The Christmas party.’

‘It was a group effort.’

‘Was it?’

‘Yes.’

‘Vakarian.’

‘Yes…’ he said, cautiously like it might be the wrong answer.

‘Why?’

‘Why, what?’

‘Why did you instigate all that?’

‘Did you not like it?’

She frowned and almost looked cross for a moment.

‘Of course I liked it. I loved it actually. I was surprised by it yes, but grateful.’

‘Then what does it matter, why?’

‘It matters to me.’

‘I’ll be honest if you want me too, but it might ruin your Christmas buzz.’

‘Shoot.’

Garrus chuckled at her pun.

‘I realised that you didn’t know how to err… Christmas.’

‘I didn’t know how to?’ Her voice was incredulous, he may have over stepped. Oh well, I’m in the line of fire now, he thought, may as well get shot.

‘Yes. Kaidan and Joker made me realise Christmas is a family thing for a lot of people. Whenever I asked you about the festive season you refused to talk about it. I figured because you had no family, you never learned how to enjoy it. I… we hoped that we could create at least one Christmas, one familial moment, where you weren’t alone and were very much loved by everyone.’

Shepard stared and then she looked down.

‘Fuck.’

‘Erm… in a good way or in one of those bad ways where you are mustering the rage in which you end up throwing me off the ship?’ Garrus stepped forward and risked petting her on the shoulder. It would either be a comfort, or she would break it. Either way he could live with.

When Shepard looked up there were tears brimming, threatening to tumble down her face. She smiled and confused him. Was she happy or upset? He petted her shoulder some more.

‘Garrus… I… don’t know what to say,’ she shook her head and the tears dropped quickly from her eyes.

‘Good words or bad words? I’m trying to get a read here Shepard.’

She laughed, and more water rolled down her cheeks.

‘Good, you dumbass,’ she laughed and looked up at him. Her eyes caught him, and he was trapped in her gaze.

‘Well, I’d hoped, but I’m not terribly skilled at reading humans… or women for that matter. I was just hoping to give you a memorable gift.’

‘You, you’re the gift.’

‘I am?’

‘Yes, your presence every day. I know I have someone by my side who I can trust.’

‘I’m glad you see me that way.’

‘Garrus?’

‘Yes?’

‘Do you trust me?’

‘Of course, Shepard. I’d run toward a thresher maw for you. I might wonder what the hell I was doing, but I’d do it.’

‘And what would you say to me if I were scared and didn’t know what to do?’

‘I’d say, you and me both. I think you can be scared, not know what to do and then face the unknown together. Is that what you mean?’

‘Yes.’

‘Well then, when are we going?’

She laughed again, but this time it was nervous. Shepard leaned in toward him and kissed him on the mouth. Garrus felt his insides flip with excitement and terror all at the same time. She pulled away and looked at him, eyes full of fear and face filled with vulnerability. She was stunning in that moment.

‘I’d like to go now, Garrus, if you don’t mind and I’d very much like you to come with me.’

‘Always, Shepard, just show me the way.’ She took his hand and led him across the room.

They tripped on the Santa suit he’d dumped on the floor and they landed awkwardly together, feet tangled in red material.

‘Is there a less bumpy way?’

‘I doubt it,’ She said kissing him again and they stayed there a while longer.


End file.
